Still Depressed; However, I took One Step
Dear Counseling Journal,
I wrote an entry a few weeks ago about being sad. Well, I got tired of being sad so I decided to do something about it. My family couldn’t take me lying around, not talking, not caring for them or myself any longer. What did I do? I took one small step at a time. A few weeks ago, I couldn’t have dug deep for anything. I wasn’t motivated. I got a little energy. I got a little sleep, and I knew I had to take action at that moment. As I said, I started with one step. I decided I wanted to take a spinning class. I’d like to say I took a class and completed it but I didn’t. Including the warm-up, I stayed on the bike for 15 minutes exactly and got off. I wasn’t tired. I wasn’t enjoying it. I told myself to ride for a set amount of time and 15-minutes was the time I set in my mind. That was the first time I had worked out in over two months. As I write these words, I’m wondering will you consider a 15-minute ride a “workout” but it doesn’t matter. It was my first step and regardless of the length of time, I took a step to tackle and end my depressive episode and for that, I’m proud of myself. I didn’t magically feel better after my workout. I didn’t feel different but I did have a small sense of accomplishment. That one step was enough to propel me to take another step to re-engage with my family. Day 1 of my journey is complete!
If you have ever experienced depression, then you know it can be difficult to overcome depression. Each person's journey is different. Some people begin to feel better after weeks or months and they are able to build on that momentum. Other people struggle for years without reprieve but they develop a way of functioning each day. As a therapist, I understand everyone cannot dig deep when experiencing depression but when you can I encourage you to do one thing. The great news is you get to decide what that one thing is. In the meantime, take care of yourself and try to do something today that you used to find enjoyable even if it isn’t pleasurable today. What can you do for 10-minutes today that you haven’t done in a while?
If you are thinking about harming yourself in any way, it is time to seek help immediately. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline phone number is 800-273-8255. Someone is available 24/7; it is free and confidential.