Happily Married Couples Change with the Seasons
When the seasons change often, new clothes are required. This could be due to significant variations in your weight during the previous seasons. Regardless of the reason, a change of season is a favorable time to buy new clothes and to freshen up your wardrobes with new styles, new colors, and possibly other sizes. The process of replacing the old with the new, or the hesitancy to fully embrace your current situation is similar to relationships. How can you renew your relationship? Conversely, how are your unmet hopes and dreams keeping you from taking on new habits to rejuvenate your relationship?
If your body has changed, those old clothes may not achieve your desired look or result. Will you walk around in clothes made for someone else just because it is easier? Will you hide behind layers of oversized clothes instead of allowing others to see the authentic you?
How often do you find in relationships, that you go along with a decision you do not like because it is easier than expressing your feelings, voicing your opinions, or having another disagreement? If you put enough of these “go along to get along” events together, you get years of suppressed feelings.
As it applies to your relationship, what areas do you need to energize? Do you need to eradicate old habits of withdrawing during disagreements? Are there spending habits that need to change? Do you need to end the game and stop keeping score with your spouse? Do you need to express yourself to your spouse? Do you need to strip away selfish behaviors? What old habits do you need to purge from your toolbox?
As you prepare for the new clothes, you may find it necessary to clean out your closets. In doing so, you may find some things you didn’t need, never wore, and will not replace.
What are you keeping that you don’t need? Are there friendships you don’t need to maintain? Are there social media accounts that you need to close? Have time and technological advancements made certain behaviors obsolete? Are you holding on to old dreams that you can no longer achieve due to time or circumstances? Are your hopes and dreams realistic?
You may be asking yourself, when do I have time to clean beyond the basics? If you cannot make room for the new stuff, you may choose to clutter up your home with the old and the new. Similarly, in relationships, you may refuse to purge old habits and add more unhealthy habits to despairing relationships.
What new habits and behaviors do you need to make room for in your relationship? Do you need to include weekly date nights? Do you need to add monthly family meetings? Do you need to incorporate time to serve in the community together? Do you need to embrace one of your spouse’s favorite hobbies? Do you need to add authentic friendships and community? Is your sexual intimacy on life support? Do you need to boost your self-care routine or to create a routine?
No one wants to be in a relationship replete with years of disappointments, arguments, unforgiveness, and scorekeeping. Therefore, it is imperative to make the priorities in your life a priority. Whether it is clearing out unhealthy communication habits, reducing spending tendencies, or deleting social media accounts, there are ways you can freshen up your relationship with the change of the seasons. Think about how good it would feel to rid your relationship of some of the unwanted behaviors and to give your relationship a fresh start. You get to decide where to start. Whether you’ve been together for 2 months or 25 years, keep it fresh, exciting, and interesting. Be the A+ student of your spouse. Your relationship will be better for your efforts.